feeling special

This is 33 by Craig Kerbrat

It’s my birthday! it’s the beginning of a new year of life. A time to reflect, and a time to look forward.

Because my birthday is so close to the beginning of the year, reflecting on the last year more or less goes hand in hand with reflecting on 2017. And as I've said before, 32 kinda sucked. A lot of things came apart. A lot of things ended. I had a lot of emotions.

But 32 was also a rebuilding year. I took the lumps, and started on the road to bettering my life. And because of that, I think 33 is looking to be a pretty awesome year.

When everything started falling apart, I started exercising. And I think that might have been essential in helping me get through it all. I've been going to the gym every day before work for a few months now, and that on top of the outdoor exercise I got over the summer, I'm currently in the best shape I've ever been in. Maybe it's a bit braggy to say that, but I'm really proud of myself for it.

So the first day of 33, even though I was tired, I got up and went to the gym like every other day. And I felt awesome for it. It started off my day on a great note.

(Totally just an opportunity to post a shameless selfie.) 

(Totally just an opportunity to post a shameless selfie.) 

The awesome continued throughout the day as the birthday wishes started pouring in via text messages and social media. There really is no better ego boost than a birthday on Facebook. I know it does the work by reminding everyone, but I love getting those birthday wishes. It's a major reminder that I'm loved. And there have been many times over the last year where I wondered about that. Depression is stupid that way. So the wishes really bolster the mind from those feelings.

On top of that, I’ve been spoiled all day long. Birthday cards, birthday presents, treats, and a fantastic dinner out. It’s been a fantastic day. 

All of this is basically to say that things are looking up on the social front as well. If all of these people want to do something nice for me, I clearly have a lot of love coming my way, and a lot to send back.

I also think I’m doing a better job at getting my life under control. I have a long way to go with it, but I’m working at it. Setting small goals, working towards them. Doing simple things like setting up dentist appointments (with help), dealing with rental insurance, and getting in those regular medical check ups. All of these little things add up into becoming the responsible adult I’d like to be someday. 

In my last post I set a bunch of goals for myself for the year, and for life in general. But I can’t lose sight of how far I’ve come. All of the years leading up to now have been a journey with many ups and downs. And now we’re here. This is 33. It’s gonna be my year. I can feel it.